i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Randomize
