Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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