Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize