what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Randomize
