I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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