By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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