There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Randomize
