theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
