By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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