David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
