I'm lost and stupid without you.
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
