im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
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