I wish i was in the wii world.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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