You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
organizing the empties. That sober.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
