This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
