Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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