and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
