Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
