dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Randomize
