You really coming over, don't trick.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
