sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
