I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
