Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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