me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
