If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize