It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize