Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
