I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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