So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
