NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
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