On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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