I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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