the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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