i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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