i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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