the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
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