8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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