there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
