In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize
