I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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