u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
