Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
