it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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