Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Randomize
