I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
