My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
