Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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