My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Randomize
