we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
