Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I wish you could order shots online.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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